The Lightkeeper by Susan Wiggs

Author:Susan Wiggs [Wiggs, Susan]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Historical, Fiction
ISBN: 9781408956700
Google: Oet8LKhOvfEC
Goodreads: 671215
Publisher: MIRA
Published: 1997-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Twelve

The next morning, Mary lay abed. She stared at the ceiling, noting the pattern in the plastered beams and listening to the skylarks and water thrushes outside. The birds started each day with an argument, calling across the yard to each other. Soon, when the hawks and eagles began to circle on the hunt, the songbirds would fall silent.

She closed her eyes and wondered where the songbirds went when they weren’t singing. A moment later she left off birds and started thinking of Jesse. Again. And always. Everything had changed between them last night, of that she was certain.

A pleasant fluttering stirred inside her, and she smiled. The babe was growing larger and more active by the day. Before long, she’d be as big as a house. Her smile faltered. She remembered how Jesse had looked at her just before he’d said good-night. His gaze shifted downward, had taken in the swell formed by the growing baby. In his eyes, she had seen…what? Anticipation? Dread? Curiosity? She could not be sure.

She knew it was asking a lot, expecting Jesse to accept a stranger’s child. But that was exactly the way it must be. It was what she dreamed of.

She sat up straight, her eyes open, her heart pounding. She had her answer. The desire and need she had hidden—even from herself—had finally made themselves known.

At last she was able to admit the truth. All her lofty thoughts about fulfilling her destiny, helping Jesse to heal from his age-old grief—all of that was only so much blather. An excuse to hide what she really yearned for. She wanted to stay here forever with Jesse Morgan. She wanted to raise her child here. She wanted to love Jesse. And sweet saints, with an ache so sharp that she winced, she wanted him to love her.

“Foolish baggage,” she muttered under her breath as she rose and washed and cleaned her teeth. “He’s a rude beast who lives alone, licking his wounds. What in heaven’s name does he need with the likes of you? And remember, you gave your heart to the last man who saved you, and see how that ended.”

She brushed out her hair in quick, vicious strokes that gradually slowed as she lost herself in remembrances of the night before. Jesse had brushed her hair. She thought about the sensual, lingering strokes, the intimacy of his hand touching her head, trailing the length of her hair. She remembered the sensation of his gaze caressing her so frankly that she felt as if he’d actually touched her. Perhaps mere was hope for them if only Jesse could let go of the past. He had to learn to believe that loving did not always mean pain and loss.

Mary had come out of nowhere, a woman the age Emily had been when he’d lost her. Emily had been pregnant when he’d lost her. Mary had been pregnant when he’d found her. No wonder he saw her as a threat.

She wanted him to see her as a promise.

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